With it being the season of love, I wanted to take a moment to celebrate my own relationship. I’ve said this before, but I truly think I have the best husband and marriage that I could’ve ever imagined. Because I am only one half of our story, I thought it would be fun to include my husband and do an activity together in honor of Valentine’s Day. I always enjoy watching Q&As on YouTube, so this is my spin on a Couple’s Q&A in written form.
We each wrote a set of questions that we honestly wanted to know the answers to and then wrote out our responses for each other to keep. Don’t worry, he knew that I would be posting the answers, and we wrote our questions with that in mind. We had a lot of fun doing this, and I recommend that couples try it out! It’s perfect for people whose love language is words of affirmation like me. Depending on the type of questions you do, you could even make it into a game where you try to guess what the other person’s answers are going to be. My answers to his questions are first, and his answers to my question follow. Enjoy!
My Answers to His Questions
1. What do you think is the most adventurous thing we have ever done?
I have two very different answers to this question.
- Getting married as young as we did (after our freshman year in college). We were confident in our love and its maturity despite other people thinking that we were crazy or that it would never last. We figured out married life while both going to school full-time and working part-time jobs. In a way, this caused us to have many more adventures together, because everything we encountered as a couple was a “first”: first apartment, first adult job, and each new life chapter in general.
- THE hike. You already know which one. We were so naive and unprepared for that hike on Cadillac Mountain in Maine. There was a point when I actually started to get so nervous that we wouldn’t be able to get to the top that I was pondering a helicopter rescue. I have literally never been so sweaty in my whole life, and I can’t imagine what we smelled like at the restaurant afterwards. I am proud of us for living in the moment, but we were kinda dumb for not having water or snacks. We need to redeem ourselves someday!
2. What adventures do you want to go on for sure?
- We have literally been married for 7 years in May, and we have not booked a vacation without our parents since our honeymoon. I can’t wait to create an experience for ourselves and to show the world to Ember.
- The Farm. (For those reading, we are manifesting a sustainable homestead with some land, bees, and maybe even chickens. We don’t say if we have a farm someday. We say when).
3. What about our relationship/love has changed the most?
I understand you so much more now. I wouldn’t say that I was angry before, but I used to feel sad when you would want alone time in your office or want to go play games by yourself. Now, I completely get it. You have always been aware of when and how you need to recharge yourself, and I admire that. Since going through college and becoming parents, I think we have both started to focus on making sure that each other’s cups are full and talking more about mental health. We hold each other accountable, and I don’t think we ever did anything like that when we were younger.
4. After almost a decade together, what still surprises you about us/me/you?
I am still surprised how comfortable I am being 100% myself around you, and how you tolerate all of my weirdness. Dare I say, you actually enjoy my goofiness and weird (aka big loofah doofah) energy. I sometimes surprise myself at some of the stupid things that I say and feel the need to apologize for being silly; however, you always say not to apologize and that you love it.
Also, I am still surprised at how easily marriage comes to us. I think it’s safe to say that the “honeymoon” phase is over, but we still don’t go to bed angry at each other. I still get butterflies when I see you out in public (especially when we see each other from afar and raise our hands high to get each other’s attention). I still would hang out with you 24/7 if I could, and you’re still my best friend. Like are you real?
5. What are you most excited for 5 years from now? 10? 20?
I don’t know when it’s going to happen, but I can’t wait to add another little one to our family. I’m also excited for The Farm, traveling the world with you, and living life together in general (cliche but so true).
6. Favorite game to play together?
Hmmm this is a hard one, because we go through phases with games. That said, I have the most memories of playing the old school Nancy Drew computer games with you. I’m pretty sure we played the same one in high school (when I cried because I was hormonal and got sad about the gear puzzle) that we did on the couch in our own home as adults.
His Answers to My Questions
1. If I hadn’t asked you out first, would you have ever asked me? Explain your answer either way.
I might have, but I was also super depressed at the time and wasn’t considering much in general.
2. What is your definition of love?
When I come home and I see you and Ember excitedly waiting for me at the door. It makes me feel so special
3. How would you say becoming parents has affected our marriage?
I would say it has definitely made us have to be more intentional with how we spend time with each other, but I think we are closer and more of a team than before.
4. What do you think is the key to a happy marriage and how does it play out in our marriage?
I think the key is respect and empathy. The hard part I think for some people is getting so wrapped up in themselves that they don’t realize that the other person in the relationship is trying just as hard to be as happy as they are. I think we do a really good job of trying to build each other up and support each other in that regard.
5. How has our love and relationship changed from age 15 and 16 to 25 and 26?
We are definitely more open with each other and relaxed. We haven’t had a fight in a really long time, and I put that up to us just treating each other with respect and listening.
6. What is it like to be married to a person with anxiety?
Anxiety inducing haha
Let me know in the comments section if there are any questions that you would like to ask my husband or me. Have a great week, and Happy Valentine’s Day!